小小的秘密

“Since it is my last week, I would like to tell you a small secret. My dad is a pastor.”

My hands were clammy and my heart was at my throat. God was smiling at me from above. My name came up, and I rose to approach the stage. All too soon, I am already beside the translator, microphone in hand. Oh boy, how did I get there. I smiled awkwardly at the translator, then at the upturned faces, took a deep breathe and lifted the microphone to my mouth.

I was really nervous, because …well, I was really nervous! I stumbled through the thanksgiving, acutely aware that the translator was improvising on my very broken mandarin. Pause. The truth. And all of a sudden, peace. After I told them I am a pastor’s kid, the bubbles of anxiety stilled. God was there, His hands on my shoulders assuring me.

Yes, my ammunition did gun them down. There was a visible rise of activity the the first two rows across the floor. Kae told me after that the church was in shock, and they were whispering furiously to each other. Nice work God, all according to plan. A good speech from the perspective of a PR officer, I even managed to tease out laughter which is inherently a risky spot. But more importantly, I have done it for Him. Thank God for His deliverance.

Mentee was real sweet. Surprised me with a home-made cake, and gorgeous bracelet. Yet, the sweetest of all, was her very first prayer and she prayed for me. I pray that God will continue to look over her growth in faith, it has been a humbling experience to be able to be her mentor.

So now, we are square. I have claimed my identity back, and with my church’s blessing, may I have the courage to walk with it.

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